It's Hot

I feel like I need a lawn chair set up on my front porch with a pitcher of lemonade while I watch the neighborhood children play. I see myself wearing a white suit with a white hat and mopping my brow with a handkerchief. I would say things like, "Oh, lawdy, it's hot" and "Ladybird! Where is my lemonade?" You know something has gone wrong with your weather when you start to imagine yourself fondly as a dapper southern gentleman.

It think actually, the problem lies with me. I complain about the weather far more than anyone else I know, and I think it's because the weather in Seattle stays between about 50 and 75 degrees all-year round. There are exceptions, but you can pretty much count on that range. Everywhere else in the world, however, people puts up with more inconsistency. It broke 30 degrees Celsius in my apartment today, and that is where I draw the line. I have been avoiding AC for various reasons, but 30.9 (87) is simply too hot. The only thing keeping me from seeking out a Starbucks and camping out is the thought that I have to wear clothes if I want to go there. The only way I can describe the humidity is: Arkansas. We just went through rainy season here, and all I could think of was that the streets of Kyoto smelled like Arkansas.

This rant about the weather is going to look pretty silly (if it doesn't already) when August turns out to be worse than July and I have nothing to talk about.

On July 17th I will be pulling a float in the Gion Matsuri festival in downtown Kyoto. It's one of the biggest festivals in all of Japan, and for the first time in its history there will be a float pulled by an all-foreigner team. I am looking forward to it... kind of. Everyone who does it says that right afterward they feel like they never want to do it again. Two years ago it took place in a rainstorm. It's also very possible that it could take place in 90 degree heat. Shivering cold or dangerously hot, the 25 of us will be pulling a two-ton float down the street. There is no mechanism to turn the floats so we will have to physically pick it up and turn it 90-degrees. I will post pictures of the event.

In other news, I went to Hiroshima sometime between my last post and this one. I went to the Peace Park and the A-Bomb Dome (the remnants of a building that was directly below the blast) and also ate some delicious okonomiyaki. Pictures:

A monument at the Peace Park. If anyone has ever been in an elementary school class where you made cranes and sent them to Hiroshima, then this is one of the places they end up.
This is a building that survived the August 6th blast. The rest of the ruins were cleared out and built around, but it was decided to keep this one in its present state. However, because the building continues to deteriorate, there are efforts to restore it to its original ruined state.

And this is the most delicious picture ever taken. Hiroshima is famous for its okonomiyaki, and we went to a place called Okonomiyaki Village to eat lunch. mmmm.
And lastly, I spent a few days relaxing on Miyajima, which is an island off the coast of Hiroshima. The island's main claim to fame is its giant Shinto gate that lies on the beach. When the tide comes in the gate looks like it is floating in the water. The shrine associated with the gate is built off the ground so that it, too, appears to be floating in the high tide.

At low tide.
At high tide.

All in all, Hiroshima was a nice little vacation. I have now been to both Nagasaki and Hiroshima so I somehow feel that my latent unconscious war guilt has been assuaged. Hiroshima's peace park is way better than Nagasaski's, by the way. So if you are planning a nuclear pilgrimage and can only go to one, you should go to Hiroshima. The one in Nagasaki is just filled with awful publicly financed sculptures from governments all over the world.

I don't think I will be taking any vacations any time soon. July has got Gion Matsuri and some other international events and August will see the new JETs come to Kyoto. There are something like 45 new JETs, which is an absurd number. There are only 75 or so JETs in the prefecture, and it's going to be an adventure to have half of them leave to be replaced by fresh meat. As PA, though, I am able to look over their files, and it seems like they are a pretty competent bunch. I look forward to meeting them in Tokyo.

And Spring is Over

Let me start with two disturbing trends:

1) The weather has started to get warmer. Hot even. For some reason my office is considerably hotter than anywhere else in the city. I find myself getting sweaty and irritable without even realizing it. I will suddenly realize I am furiously pounding the escape key because i am typing in the wrong language, but I am so flustered that I accidentally hit F1, which obviously brings up the help menu. This unreasonable request causes my ancient work computer to stagger under the strain. Anyway, the point is that the weather right now isn't bothering me so much as the prospect that it will only get much much hotter. It really isn't even that hot outside, but it will be. "When does cool biz start and we start turning on the air conditioner?" I ask, and the answer fills me with dread, "July."
2) Due to the rising of Kyoto's temperatures (obviously due in turn to global climate change) I have been leaving my window open constantly. My neighbor does the same. His window is three feet diagonal from mine, and I can see into his apartment when I go onto the veranda. Somehow, though, I have absolutely no idea where the door to his apartment is. By my calculations, his apartment should be occupied by the elevator I use every day. I only know that he lives in the same dimension as me because I hear him cough all the time. He is sick or something, I guess. The disturbing part if this trend is the following: whenever I hear him give off a little cough I am painfully reminded that he can likewise hear me. I sometimes (all the time) talk to myself, my computer, my food, and just about everything else that can't verbally defend itself. Sometimes after I say something a little too loudly I hear a little cough from my neighbor. Maybe he isn't so sick.

Now that I have gone into the not-so-happy trends in my life, it's probably for the best if I included some good things:

1) It's nice enough outside that I can hang out on the veranda. Last weekend I took my lunch outside and watched an entire baseball game taking place in the adjacent elementary school (coaches versus kids). At one point a tiny Japanese kid sprinted from center to right field and made a diving catch. I literally applauded. I hope nobody saw me.
2) The banks of the Kamo River are once again warm enough to frequent in the evenings. My favorite thing to do last summer was to get some beers and some friends, and go hang out on the river after dinner. (It's not without its dangers, however. Hawks and crows will grab whatever is in your hands. These guys are brazen and nasty. I read that a crow recently stole a prairie dog from the Ueno zoo in Tokyo. http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/07/world/asia/07crows.html )
3) I don't know if I should tell you this or not. Here goes. I was reading an article in a Japanese magazine and happened to see a picture of an attractive semi-nude American. Who's that? I wonder to myself, she's not bad looking. I get around to reading the picture's caption, and it turns out this girl is the infamous Mylie Cyrus I have been reading about. I know everyone is scandalized by the fact that her dad, Vanity Fair, and everyone involved turned a fifteen year-old Hanna Montana star into a object of sexuality and thereby robbed the American people of what little innocence they had left. That's not why i am upset, though. I am upset because now I have to live with the fact that for 5 seconds, between me looking at the photo and reading the caption, I was attracted to a fifteen year-old. Thank you Mylie Cyrus, I am now officially a huge jerk.

Now, onto the events of today.

I am working tomorrow (a Saturday; I am not pleased) so my boss gave me some time in lieu awhile back. Because i am working all day on a Saturday he gave me two half days. Today was one of those days. I was supposed to come into work at 2pm. Of course I forgot, though, and came in right on the dot at 930am. They told me to come back at 2pm, and I was left, wearing a suit coat and tie, with nothing to do for the next four hours. I let my legs do the deciding and walked around in places in Kyoto I had never seen.

That's when I realized that there is a reason I have never seen these parts. I walked through a "market" of local vendors selling socks and fish flakes, the "projects" where the gardens are well-kept but the denizens dare to not properly separate their garbage, and small temples so filled with luxury cars I could not enter.

I then came across Hongwanji (I don't know why there is a 'w' in the name. There is no such sound in the Japanese language as 'gwa'). It is one of those giant tourist attractions that I should have gone to in the first week, but never made it. I entered on a whim and happened to catch a Buddhist service. It's been awhile since I heard some honest-to-god chanting monks, and it was a nice alternative to work.

I then went to a local bookstore to buy a magazine. I looked at the Economist and Scientific American, but it turns out the English versions are 1200 yen (12 dollars or so). Really? For one issue? I could have bought Jane Eyre for 880 yen (not that I would want to do something like that). I settled on 440 yen for the Japanese edition of the latest Newsweek.

Now, if you had asked me fifteen minutes ago, I would have told you that my morning was totally interesting and completely worth writing about. Looking back on it, turns out I would have been very very wrong. Will I go back and delete my account of my very ordinary day? No. This is a blog, and writing a blog means never having to say your sorry (or be responsible for the quality of your posts).

I have a quiz for you. Quick, name me a food that goes well both with beer and milk. Stumped? here's your answer:
RITZ! Tonight I tested the ritz and beer combination. Not bad. Not bad at all.

Hanami 2k8

Hanami is the activity / hobby / cultural institution of watching cherry blossoms as they bloom. There are websites dedicated to keeping track of how far along the flowers are. They go from buds to full blooming in about a week depending on the weather, species, and location, so you have to keep close track if you want to go on the right day. Then it is suddenly over. Last weekend, the flowers were either full or nearly so, and this weekend they are in decline. I did this year's hanami and the old imperial palace grounds and in the mountains to the east. Megan and I ate donuts and drank coffee while checking out the weeping cherry blossom trees at the palace grounds, and I went during the week in the evening to watch the blossoms in full bloom. Because it was the evening the temple had equipped the place with strategically placed lights of different colors. It was all very well done and simply surreal. Unfortunately my camera takes crap for pictures at night so I can't show you (that's right, I am blaming it on the camera).


This picture is the last viewable one I could get before it got too dark. I have about a dozen more, but they look sort like I took pictures of the memories of a drunk person. Which is really too bad because the scene was truly amazing. Take my word for it. In other news, I have become a wholehearted supporter of genetically modified foods. Why? Efficiency. Why eat one strawberry at a time when I can eat between 6 -8 at time. Observe:

Touristing Kyoto in Earnest

Caroline came to Japan / Kyoto this past week. I took the opportunity (excuse) to take three days of vacation. Add the facts that Thursday is a national holiday and I have Friday off because I am working this Sunday, and suddenly I have an 8 day weekend. Also, there is an epic battle going on in Kyoto between the forces of spring and winter over which has control of the weather. Round one goes to spring: Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday were beautiful. Winter battled back to make Wednesday and Thursday miserable. Spring is on a counter-offensive today (Friday), but the war is far from over. Anyway, the point is that I got to do some first-rate touristing in the sun. I went from going to work in a winter coat and scarf to sunburning my neck in two days. Kyoto-ites keep telling me that there are seasons in this city; I don't believe them.

For those thinking of coming to Kyoto, here is a rundown of some major tourist sites and their corresponding RAD (Rating And Description).


Kinkakuji (Golden Pavilion) - RAD factor: 6 (out of 10). Kinkakuji is all the rage among tourists. I can't count the number of tourists who come into the Intl. Center looking for the bus that goes there. In a nutshell, Kinkakuji is a medium sized temple covered in shiny gold that is surrounded by a pond. If you only have one day in Kyoto, I suppose, Kinkakuji is a safe bet. I mean, it's pretty and all, but it's always the same KIND of pretty. A temple of gold is always going to be a temple of gold. You will never go there and think to yourself, man, the Golden Pavilion seems a lot more golden than the last time I saw it. Also, you are never going to discover a little personal corner of beauty that you can appreciate all to yourself. Everyone knows that the gold is pretty and everyone knows where to take a picture of it. On the other hand, you can go there any day of the week and in any weather conditions, and you can be assured that you will get 100% of your money's worth out of the place.

Ginkakuji (Silver Pavilion) - RAD factor: 8.5. Ginkakuji is the older sibling to Kinkakuji. I went there earlier in my contract and was left feeling unimpressed. It was hot, muggy, and crowded. I would have given it a solid 5 out of 10 had I not visited it again this week. Catch this place on the right day and you are in Narnia. The place is carpeted in moss that glows an unearthly green in the sunlight. If there aren't too many people around, you can stand in one place and take it all in. There is no one single aspect that makes this temple great, but there is an supreme attention to detail. For example, when you are approaching the main gate, on your right there is a wall of hedges and a line of trees. Between the thick foliage of the hedge and the trees there is a gap - about 5 feet high and 3 feet high - that lets you glimpse a nearly hidden bamboo forest. There is also a sand garden that abstractly depicts waves as well as a perfectly conical Mt. Fuji. In a crowd you are forced to file past as you dodge the line of sight of amateur photographers, but otherwise you can admire the natural beauty that man can create.

Kitano Tenmangu - RAD factor: 5. Kitano Tenmangu might only have gotten a 4, but since it is only about a 15 minute walk from my house I bumped it up a point. My main complaint is that it is a one-trick pony. It has plum trees that blossom into a colorful and odoriferous orchard in March, but the rest of the year leaves it little better than your standard run-of-the-mill shrine. To its credit, it is spacious enough that you can always find a beautiful corner that you haven't seen before. It also tends to not be frequented by your typical nama gaijin - so that is a plus if you are adverse to khaki shorts and hiking backpacks.

Nijo Castle - RAD factor: 7.5. Nijo gets a 1 point proximity boost, as well. It is always crawling with tourists and the occasional tour group of Tokyo high school students. Technically I suppose the castle was built to defend the Shogun from would-be usurpers, but it looks mostly as if Tokugawa Ieyasu just said, screw it, who's gonna attack me? Build me a garden with a fence and a moat. And I want koi fish in that moat. That said, the guy must also have hated getting sneaked up on. He made the main hall so that the floors creaked when you walk on them. Apparently it's supposed to sound like nightingales singing. I suppose the creaks would be pleasant enough when your retinue is walking around thinking of ways to better serve you, but nowadays the building is frequented by hundreds of overweight tourists whose combined creaking just makes it sound like the building was poorly built. Anyway, the parapets offer a very nice view of the city and there is a map coded so that you can tell what plants are blooming during which parts of the year.

Iwatayama Monkey Park (Monkey Mountain) - RAD factor: 9. Monkey Mountain is a little out of the way, but you are missing out if you don't go. After a short hike up the mountain you reach a small shack at the top next to a clearing with a gorgeous view of Kyoto. This clearing is also where the monkeys chill out all day. Just before the shack employees feed them, the monkeys get all anxious and start making a strange hooting noise. It is pretty disconcerting. That and the occasional monkey scuffle led me to feel less than comfortable. I kept having visions of the monkeys all simultaneously going planet of the apes on me. It doesn't help that the entire way up the mountain there are signs warning you not to show the monkeys food, throw rocks at the monkeys, come between a baby monkey and its mother, look a monkey directly in the eyes, or touch the monkeys. The rules were never written all in once place, rather they were haphazardly written along the path. It's as if they made a rule for every monkey-violence related incident the park has had. The shack workers were very nice, though, and seemed very comfortable with the monkeys. They said that the monkeys recognized the workers, and indeed the monkeys were buddy-buddy with them - except for the time when a monkey jumped up and slapped food out of the hand of a worker who was trying to feed it. I accidentally left my umbrella at the top of monkey mountain, and because I am very attached to this umbrella, I made Caroline go back with me to the base station. All I had to do was say the words, "I think I left my umbrella at the top..." and the station lady was on the phone and the monkey feeder ran down the mountain to hand-deliver my umbrella. Well done Japan, well done.

Monkey mountain deserves a video. This is the scene as the monkeys are starting to gather in anticipation of their afternoon feeding. I felt a little surrounded.



We also went to Kiyomizu Temple, which is a solide 9.5 out of 10, but because I didn't bring my camera that day its description will have to wait for another day. Which could be awhile because my vacation is just about over. I can't wait to see how much work has piled up on my desk in my absence.

Now it's Spring

After reading my entry from last week about how spring is not on Kyoto's to-do list, Kyoto decided to get itself into gear and stop snowing. I have even taken to eating lunch in the great outdoors on the roof of my building at work. I didn't know it until a few days ago, but apparently the roof of the Kyoto Prefectural office building is a park, complete with lawn, benches, and flowers. That was definitely not in my orientation. Wait, I didn't have an orientation.

Anyway, two weeks ago or so I was talking to my fellow CIR friend, Megan. I told her how I thought our lives would make very good overly-dramatic comics. She is quite the artist and decided to go about drawing it. With help from another friend, Rachel, they came up with a piece that pretty adequately conveys my job. (The character is apparently not me, but if you take a look at the eyebrows you will quickly realize that it cannot be anyone else.)

I Don't Care, It's Still Winter

I have a few rules in life. One of them is this: "If it's snowing, it's not Spring yet." Seems simple enough to me, but Kyoto didn't get the memo. We are into March now, and it still continues to periodically snow. I am not used to this. Snow once every two years is good enough for anyone. It is very pretty, though. I tried to convey the this whimsical wintry beauty in the photo above, but I think it just looks like a sloppy and cold snowstorm.

Because of the conditions outlined above, I minimize my time spent outdoors during the work week. Walk to work, walk back, that's it. I even interrupt my return trip with an interlude in my grocery store. Nothing puts a smile on my face like listening to the sounds the store offers. When you first enter there is a tape player blasting out a man's voice simulating what you might hear if you were in an actual market: "Oranges! Oranges! Oranges! They're delicious and cheap! Bring some home tonight!" Are you trying to trick me into thinking I am at a farmer's market and you aren't some disembodied cassette recorded in 1982? Once you proceed through the entrance you start to hear the music pumped through the speakers. I wish I could remember all of the tunes the PA system pumps out. Sometimes its difficult to tell which 80s song you are listening to because rather than playing the actual song, the store chooses to broadcast a cheap midi imitation that sounds like it you should be in an elevator. Here are the songs I can be sure I have heard:

Hey Jude - Beatles
Norwegian Wood - Beatles
All I want for Christmas is You - Mariah Carey
Take My Breath Away - Berlin (from Top Gun)

And yesterday I definitely heard the soothing sounds of the ocean playing as I tried to decide if I should buy chocolate covered potato chips (I did).

I wasn't going to include this section into my blog because I didn't think "sounds I hear in my grocery store" would prove very interesting, but today in the meat section I heard something unbelievable. I honestly stopped looking at the pork and stared at the tape player with a huge grin on my face. It was what sounded like a little boy doing a rap in Japanese about ham. "Yeah, yeah, ham, ham, ham sausage. Ham and eggs, if you don't have ham just eat the eggs. Grandma! Put ham into the lunchbox, dad will like it. Of course I will like it to! I like it!" Now, this sort of thing has to be weird no matter what country you are in. I refuse to believe that this is normal. But all the other shoppers just went about their business without a second look.

Come to think of it, the same thing happened when I was eating at a ramen restaurant last week with some coworkers. We were just eating our ramen and chatting while unremarkable pop music played in the shop. Suddenly, though, the music shifted into hard core metal replete with the deep throated screams you usually hear in horror movies. Nobody batted an eyelash. I was left feeling incorrigibly out of place.


I may have mentioned in a previous post that I am doing a lecture series on sports in Seattle. Somehow I couldn't properly convey my sense of sadness at the prospect of the Sonics leaving for Oklahoma (I was just in Oklahoma! I like Oklahoma! Why do they have to steal half of what made the 90s memorable for me.) In an effort to convey my emotions, I showed them a excerpt from a recent Bill Simmons article:

"On the flip side, Presti has to be slammed a little for how the Ray Allen trade turned out: Basically, the Sonics dealt Ray Allen and "Big Baby" Davis for Jeff Green and Donyell Marshall's corpse and saved $10 million for the 2008-09 season ... money that they won't be spending on players because their soulless owner is busy destroying a 41-year history of professional basketball in Seattle. Does that sound like a good deal to you? Didn't think so. I'd have more to say here, but the poor Sonics fans are like abused dogs in an animal shelter right now. Let's just move on."

I realized I wasn't getting through when I had to explain the word "soulless."

Luckily, to help cheer me up, I spent all of Saturday wandering around Kyoto with my friend looking at the newly blossoming plum petals (you ain't nobody in this town if you don't head out to see the plum blossoms when they bloom.) I don't know what the fascination among Japanese people is with going to beautiful locations laid out perfectly with rows of flowers, and taking nothing but close-up detailed pictures of single blossoms. I mean, I appreciate the fleeting beauty of a single plum blossom as much as the next guy, but should I be neglecting the 1000 year-old temple around me? Well, if you can't beat 'em...


Oh, I forgot to write about the Great G8 Staircase Race. I explained in a previous post that I was participating in this event to promote the G8 Foreign Ministers' Meeting in Kyoto. First of all, the place was CRAWLING with people. I have never seen the staircase so busy. People wearing costumes, cheerleaders, and a ton of old Japanese men in running shorts. I hesitate to even bring up the warm up exercises they had everyone do only because I don't think I can do it justice. You know that movement you see sometimes where a person will put their arms out to the side with palms out and shake their chest from left to right? Yeah. That was part of the warm up. The stairs were miserable. I, in my feeble attempt at climbing them was dominated by the three other people I was running with. It didn't help I was running anchor of this particular relay. Thirty-nine seconds and 172 stairs later, I was at the top with a microphone in my face.
Reporter: Dou deshitaka? - How was it?
Me (panting and unable to operate my hamstrings): Kurushikatta.

Now, kurushikatta can mean a couple of different things. Here are some translations offered by www.alc.co.jp:

1. agonizing
2. bleeding
3. croosh
4. crucial
5. labored
6. laboring
7. painful
8. rough
9. stern
10. strait
11. thorny
12. trying

I don't think that was the scoop she was looking for, but it was all my poor lungs could offer. Thanks to the fact that nobody on our team was particularly slow, America took third place! Not quite the Miracle on Ice, but I was pleased. Turns out, the best runners did the worst in this competition. The German team was made up of a Japanese running club (not a German to be found in this city, apparently), and they did the worst. The winning team was the Russians, who, true to every Cold War stereotype I can muster, were stocky and burly (not to mention a little bit standoffish.) My hypothesis is that strong leg muscles are more important than long graceful strides in a staircase race. The burly Russians had some meaty legs and were thus able to outlast the competition.

Top Four Fastest Countries
1. Russia
2. Italy
3. America
4. Great Britain (Great Britain's team consisted of a Briton, an Irishman, a Lithuanian, and a Japanese.)

What you are looking at here, gentle reader, is a picture of the author's worst nightmares.

Winter in the city

Firstly, I want to apologize to Dave Chappelle. Dave, if you are reading this, I am sorry I insinuated that you went crazy and fled to Africa for a year. You are not crazy, and you were only in Africa for like two weeks. Please forgive me.

Next I want to congratulate Japan on being the only country in the world still committed to researching whales. I mean, there are still a lot of things that we can learn about them. Like how best to kill and commercially sell protected species. That's important science. And if you have to kill 1000 or so of them, and then feed their fried remains to elementary school children at public schools to accomplish this aim, well, so be it.

http://www.nytimes.com/aponline/world/AP-Antarctica-Whaling.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

It's February, but I should probably mention my Christmas and New Year's. My Christmas consisted of me going to work (sick) until 530, coming home, having dinner with a friend at Kyoto station, and going to bed. Then I woke up and realized it was Christmas, and opened my presents. It was a nice little Christmas moment.
Christmas in Kyoto was hilarious. Because there is no Thanksgiving in Japan, the Christmas decorations went up right after Halloween. And they were everywhere. Kyoto station had a tree to rival Rockefeller plaza and the church/girls school next to my work was decked out in lights. However, when Christmas rolled around, those decorations went down faster than you would believe. The Kyoto station decorations came down at 6pm on Christmas evening. This is because New Years is huge here. (Except its not really New years how we celebrate it. There are spiritual and cultural ties to Oshogatsu that our New Years just doesn't have).
I was planning on going somewhere for New Years, but then got real lazy and stayed in Kyoto. That was probably for the best, I think. Going to the trouble of traveling was the last thing I wanted to do. I thought it would be a nice laid back holiday. Maybe go out on New Years eve, then go to a temple the next day. You know, take it easy. That did not happen. I ended up not doing anything cultural on New Years. Unless, that is, you count drinking at a British pub before "dancing" at a basement techno club. Not that I like techno so much. Or dancing, for that matter. Or heineken (the only beer being served). From there is was karaoke until first train in the morning. The next day was rest. Turns out, though, that during the New Years holiday (New Years day and a few days after), you can't get money out of the ATM. That will be a mistake I won't be making next year.

There will be a next year because I recontracted. I am now staying in my current location doing my current job with the current salary until at least July 2009. I really enjoy my work (mostly), and there are a lot of things I think I can learn after I spend a year getting the hang of things. Recently I have started getting nods in the hall from the vice-governor of Kyoto. It's nice being the only foreigner in the building sometimes.

The American primaries were today. I watched them on the computer, refreshing the site every few minutes to get up to the minute details. I did the same thing the day before for the Superbowl. It was oddly similar watching the two contests unfold on the computer screen a few minutes at a time. Unlike the Superbowl, though, I still couldn't tell you who won Super Tuesday. Obama won more states, but Hillary won more delegates. At least after the Superbowl was over you knew whether to be sad or happy. Also, everyone here seems to know all about the presidential race. My coworkers told me who won the Nevada primary before I could find out. It makes me feel kind of privileged to think that I get to vote in something that affects so many peoples' lives. I used to kind of hate the American primaries system because it is such a media carnival and popularity contest, but after seeing how unique it is compared to the rest of the world I have changed my opinion.

In other patriotism related news, I am representing the United States in the Great Staircase Race. Every year Kyoto holds a race up the 177 stair Grand Staircase at Kyoto station. This year, because the G8 Foreign Ministers' Summit is being held in Kyoto, there will be a PR event wherein 4-person teams representing each of the eight countries will run a relay race up the stairs. I am a member of Team USA. I have two hopes: 1) I finish the race without my heart exploding, and 2) Team USA wins the race and we spontaneously break into chants of "USA! USA! USA!" until we are deported. Also, there is a chance I will be team leader, which means I will be on television for 30 seconds. Have you ever seen sideline reporters for the NFL try to interview an athlete after a touchdown pass? It's going to be like that, except that I am by no means an athlete. I don't think I will be getting time in lieu for this race, so you can consider this service to my country.

I did get time in lieu when I worked last Sunday at the International Center's Japanese Culture Day. I interpreted all day for a group of older ladies who were explaining the incense ceremony. After a few runs through I memorized the speech they were giving and just stopped listening. It was really interesting, though. They had guests play a game where you had to identify which scent a particular incense was out of three choices. Apparently, a master incense maker will compose an incense the same way a poet writes a poem. For example, he might see a pretty sunset, and then go about making an incense that captures the essence of that scene. The ladies who were running the show were very serious at first, but after they realized nobody knew enough to be able to take it seriously, they loosened up. My favorite part of interpreting was when the ladies were making small talk with some foreigners. The oldest lady doesn't have much contact with foreigners, I think, because she saw an American with a full beard and remarked in Japanese, "Hm, he looks like Jesus, doesn't he?" I just about died laughing (all by myself), and then declined to interpret. The next best part came when a girl with a low cut shirt participated. The old ladies used hand gestures and started complimenting the girl's... features. The girl looked at me and said, "I don't think I need a translation." Priceless.

I also went to Ine for a few days. Ine is about far north in Kyoto Prefecture as it gets. It is also real small. And full of old fishermen. My friend Rachel lives there (although she is not an old fisherman). It was nice to get out of the city and see the Japanese countryside.
Rachel took us on the scenic route. It was indeed very scenic.
This is Amanohashidate. Apparently the place where the gods dipped the spear into the ocean to create the Japanese island chain. The Japanese, who have a love of ranking things, have ranked this the third most beautiful natural spot in Japan. I think I must have gone on the wrong day.


I have never been stared at in Japan like I was stared at in Ine. Maybe it was because I was in a car full of foreigners, maybe it was because the old people were just squinting to see us, but man, there were some glares.

By the way, kudos to all of you for not coming to visit in January or February. It is cold. Not so much in terms of having actual low temperatures, although it does snow quite a bit. It is just that none of the buildings here are insulated very well, leading to a situation where going indoors only protects you from the wind, not the cold. I have a heater in my apartment, but it only makes the top half of the room warm. I have to stand up to feel it. Also, as soon as it goes off, the room is immediately cold again. Turns out six inches of concrete and a sliding glass door aren't the best insulation. I can't imagine that in a few months it will be so hot I won't be able to sleep with the windows closed.